Impostor Syndrome: Who You Let In The Room With You Matters

Not every idea needs an audience before it becomes real.

I've learned this the hard way. There is a version of seeking validation that feels like wisdom — you're being thoughtful, getting input, making sure you're not off base. But sometimes what you're actually doing is handing someone else the power to talk you out of something before you've even tried it.

And the tricky part is that the people you ask aren't always wrong for their own lives. They just cannot see yours from the inside.

Over the last couple of years I've had weekends where I decided I wanted to build a Lofi YouTube channel. Another weekend I wanted to make animated cartoons. Another one I wanted to create a coloring book. None of these things would have gotten a standing ovation from most people in my life. To them it probably sounded scattered or silly or like I was avoiding something more serious.

But none of those things were for them. They were for me. They were about curiosity and creativity and figuring out how to do something I was genuinely interested in. The Lofi channel because I listen to it daily. The cartoons because something about that idea wouldn't leave me alone. The coloring book because why not.

What I've come to understand is this — you cannot ask people to validate a vision they cannot see. Some things you are being called to do are simply outside the imagination of the people around you. That is not their fault. But it cannot be your limitation.

The people who are meant to support you will support you. And when support doesn't show up where you expected it, that's information too. Pay attention to the motive behind the enthusiasm and the silence alike.

Curate accordingly.

You don't need everyone in the room [insert your room here]. You need the right ones. And sometimes, for a season, the only person who needs to believe in the idea is you.

More to come.