Finding YOUR voice

 Finding your voice can be hard. Often times, we are afraid to speak up out of fear of what other people may think. I shared a very personal story recently. One in which I talked about how I almost didn’t graduate high school because I struggled with reading, writing and math. I went to a high school that we like to refer to as inner city. A school where the neighborhood is an urban area without a shortage of socio and economic issues. I shared this story with my weekend students because I wanted to remind them of what you can achieve when you decide that you want something bad enough.

So let’s get back to why finding your voice is important. I give Interest a hard time- because I think we rely on these well put together quotes that give us momentary motivation. Those things that make us feel good for a second and then we are right back to where we started. To me, finding your voice means simply telling your story. It means sharing the lessons you’ve learned from those stories and it means being your authentic self.

Many may not like this but I’d also dispel the fact that you must have some struggle story because you don’t have to. Your voice is still just as valuable. So I’ll share some things that have helped me.

When I first started putting myself out in the universe as I’d like to call it, I first had to check my motives and intentions. Many people will only share their stories and use their voices for likes and attention. Think about it. This is why we feel a little knot in our stomachs when we don’t get very much engagement. When we don’t get very many likes. Using your voice intentionally means sharing your message because you feel like you have something valuable to say. It doesn’t mean that you only have some valuable to say if you get a million likes. I didn’t and still don’t have a schedule for speaking, writing or anything. I simply share what I feel at the time.

The second thing I had to do was really own my story and who I was. No one can tell my story better than me. Many times we’re ashamed to tell our stories. For years I didn’t tell even my closest friends that I almost didn’t graduate high school. I was embarrassed. But I own that story and so many more because I don’t want people to look at the things I’ve accomplished and think impossible. If people are going to mirror themselves after me- I want them to know that this was not an overnight feat. My voice required GRIT, Drive and discipline. My voice means, its okay letting people that you’ve not always had it together. And that’s okay. I’m not hiding behind perfection but I’m also not living in my past. I’m sharing the things that are a part of my truth and I believe will help others.

The last thing I had to do was really focus on what was authentic to me and not what other people would like. Too often we try to cherry pick the parts of our lives that we think will resonate most to me people. What I believe is that your story will not be for everyone and that’s okay. You cannot possible touch everyone who reads your message or hear your voice. The hope is that your intentions are well put that even if you only reach one that would be enough. My life’s goal was not to write a book or start this podcast or become a teacher. I simply starting sharing my thoughts through blogging- sharing my experiences in the workplace without any regard to who was reading. I don’t worry about what people think anymore. I don’t focus on the likes, shares and reposts. I simply recognize that my message is not for everyone and as long as I am being my true authentic self, that’s okay.

 

And as much as I make fun of Pinterest, I still always have a quote: Barbara Kingsolver says: Don’t try to figure out what other people want to hear from you; figure out what you have to say.


Cari Hawthorne